I had a sausage sandwich (no, not two dudes between bread silly) for lunch today and it is riding a bit heavy in my fat "fish belly". Since I am such a fat ass, I thought, "what the hell? I might as well over do it for lunch!"
This past weekend was interesting. I stayed home with the boys on Friday, and let Brodie kick me in the testes all day long. Also, I was still sick. I swear, that kid can go from being super sweet to super grumpy in a matter of seconds. He wants to be held, he doesn't want to be held. Repeat. He was fussy most of the day, and pretty much refused to nap. Dillon, on the other hand, was pretty good. Alicia got home, and we decided to press our luck and go out for dinner to get some Mexican. Ordered our food, got it, and Dillon started acting weird. Said he was tired, wanted to lay down in the booth, and wanted me to hold him. Unusual. Well, by the time we got home, I noticed he was warm. I took his temperature, and it was 102. Awesome. So, juice, and to bed for him. Brodie decided he wanted to wake up and fuss at 1230 and I couldn't fall back asleep after that. Dillon woke up around 2, and wanted to sleep downstairs. Eventually, he ended up in our bed, and I went up to his bed because I was coughing my head off and didn't want to bother him and Alicia. So, no sleep for me. Saturday, we got up, and by 9 in the morning, Dillon was pretty much fine and back to his old stuff. So, I'm not sure what the deal was, but I am glad it didn't last very long. We ran a few errands, and I hopped on the Cannondale Rush to ride down to Klunk to pick up a part. I didn't even bother to kit up, I just wore my jeans and a helmet and my mtb shoes. I was still feeling like shit, and wanted to see how bad my knee was for the race on Sunday. Well, the knee was bad, and the lungs were burning because of the crap in them. And my throat too. Not looking to good for the Berryman Epic. I actually thought of bagging it and staying home. Jasen camped out at our house that night on the air mattress since we were leaving at 430 in the morning for the trip down south. I ended up getting a good nights sleep.
Woke up a little before 4 in the morning, made coffee, brushed the teeth, and got in the car and on the road at 430 with Steve and Jasen. The drive down was uneventful, we stopped at McDonalds in Jeff City for some mcMuffins. I was excessively gassy, sorry to my car mates. We made it to the campground, got out numbers, and went about getting motivated for the race. I was feeling pretty shitty, and had pretty much resigned myself to just riding till I didn't feel like it anymore, and then pulling the plug. Everyone was looking for Tilford, he was registered and supposed to be there, but he was a no show. However, Eric Pirtle and Chris Ploch were there, along with an off-road appearance by Brad Huff, incognito in his Springfield bike shop kit. Nice. I initially lined up in the middle/front of the field, but then decided I shouldn't since I was feeling so bunk. So, lined it up in the back. The race started, and as we rolled out of the parking area, I thought it might be fun to see if I could move up a bit. I ended up pretty close to the front and wondered what I was doing? So, I decided that it would be a good time to take a leak. Took it out on a downhill and let fly with the stream. Lost a few places, who cares? Got into the first stretch of singletrack feeling ok, better then I thought I would. Started picking people off, still not going too hard. Got to Brazil creek, the first aid station, pretty quick, around 55 minutes. For some reason, I figured I should fill my hydration pack. Bad move, I spilled water all over the place, didn't get it closed good, had to take it back off to fix it, then decided to get some of the nasty goldfish crackers they had. Then decided to get some food out of my pack, and take some tums. Super inefficient, I was there for 10 minutes. Still not really caring though. Finally got back on the bike and almost missed the trail thanks to the lemming mentality. I was following some dude who turned on the wrong trail, awesome. Rode the next stretch of the race pretty quick, made it to the first berryman aid station feeling pretty good. Got more water and pretzels, and took off. Almost missed another turn, actually rode in a circle for a bit till I found it. It was across a highway, and the marking was on a tree over there. Nice. Then a creek crossing and some very deep, slow sand that I walked, which caused me to start cramping. Some pretty steep, longs hills followed, I struggled with the cramps on all of them. I actually crashed climbing a hill, I got in some lose sand on the climb, spun the rear tire, completely stopped, and fell over before I could get unclipped. Pro!! Not only that, I slammed my bad knee into the toptube on the bike which almost made me pee my pants. Finished up the single track and limped to the next checkpoint, at the berryman campground again. Was told how fat I was by a certain someone at the checkpoint. Thanks!! Hopped back on the trail with a new dose of self confidence. I actually felt better, and rode the rest of the singletrack pretty strong even though I was fighting the cramps. Finally made it to the last road section, and kept seeing people up ahead. I figured I might as well hit the gas and I ended up passing 5 more people. So, I actually had a decent ride given the circumstances, I just wish I would not have been sick and had a gimpy knee. Not a lot else to report, there was a guard at the beer cooler by the name of Furby. Chatted it up with Huff a bit, that kid ended up 2nd!! How hot is that? Ploch won the race, and local man Mike Best ended up third. Jasen, Steve, and I finally got loaded up and headed home with a stop at Burger King. The fat man ate 2 whoppers and onion rings, which I am paying for today.
Tell me how fat I am the next time you see me.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
I killed a fly
Actually two of them. The last one landed on my wrist, I picked up the fly swatter and killed his ass dead! Right on my wrist. I am a bad man. Sweep the leg Johnny!!
I am nice and sick, I have some modeling clay coming out of my lungs today, and my throat is sore still. Should make for a fun race at the Berryman.
I am nice and sick, I have some modeling clay coming out of my lungs today, and my throat is sore still. Should make for a fun race at the Berryman.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
I have obviously angered the bike gods...
We went up to Clarinda, Iowa last weekend. Left on Friday. I decided to take the 29er with me, there is a park up there with "trails" that I figured I would try out, I also took a set of cross tires in case those trails sucked so I could ride gravel. We left Friday morning, had a delicious motherfucking breakfast from McDonalds in transit. We arrived in Clarinda after lunch. It rained on the way up, and it rained in Iowa earlier in the morning, so I figured the trails would be wet. So, I threw the CX tires (OLD Ritchey Speedmax semi-slicks) on the bike and took off. I decided to ride to the park, a little over 5 miles out of town, to check out the trail conditions. Now, keep in mind that I have never, ever rode these trails before, so I didn't know what to expect. Started in through some mowed fields, found a little single track. I knew it was going to be a problem, I was having a hard time finding traction in the wet grass. I found some single track, and hopped on it. Even tho they were covered in horse shit and acorns and walnuts, they have potential, there is just not much true single track. Anyway, needless to say, after a little over an hour, I noticed the front tire getting squishy. Nice. So, I aired it up, and decided to call it a day and come back the next day with MTB tires. Got home, changed the tires. Rode back out there the next day, flatted again about 40 minutes in. Didn't have enough CO2 to get my tire full, so I had to call Alicia to come and get me. I was very close to performing a bike toss. I also didn't mention that on Thursday, I was riding from work in Ashland to meet Alicia in Jeff City on the trail. I flatted there to. And the day before, my bike was just sitting in the fucking break room at work, and the tire went flat. Those 2 were defective tubes, me thinks, since they split on the seam of the tube. But, jeez, how many flats am I going to have? Rode the road bike yesterday in the wind, now my knee is sore, along with my throat. Not much else going on, Berryman this Sunday. Hopefully I can be full on sick for the race.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
News Flash
I had some stuff to write about, but I have forgot most of it by now. Last Friday was an off day at work, so I spent the morning with the boys and Alicia, then headed out to Cosmo in the afternoon for a quick ride on the 29er. Every time I ride this bike, something happens. This week I decided to pinch flat. I remember hitting the rock and thinking to myself that that was going to hurt. Well, it did. 3 minutes later, I was stopped replacing the tube. CO2 is not optimum in this situation. I had about half of a 12 gram cartridge left from a previous flat fix, and another full 12 gram cartridge. So, not enough co2. I ended up with a little over 15 lbs of pressure in my tire, enough to limp home. I need tubeless!!! Saturday morning I rolled out to Rock Bridge and met up with Jasen and Ryan. Took the Rush, which is what I am riding at the Berryman Epic. It had been a while since I had been on that bike, I forgot how fun it is to ride. The only thing that sux is that there is only one functional bottle cage mount. So, I packed around another bottle in my jersey pocket. I have a hydration pack, but I don't like wearing it. We got in a couple of hours, then I headed home and went to Wendy's with the boys and A. Then we went to Toys R' Us for a Thomas the Tank Engine event, which totally sucked. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy watching Thomas and messing around with the trains and tracks with Dillon, but this was hardly worth our time. They had a train mat set up, not even real track. All they had for the kids to do was color pics of the trains, and it was headed up by some trailer trash employee that was too busy talking to some hoosier about drinking and partying. Thats right, they were talking about this stuff in front of the kids! Nice! So, Alicia tattled on her to one of the managers. That evening, Steve and Shelia came over to sit with the boys while A and I went to the MU game. I'm not a football fan. I basically went for the free food, and to people watch. I almost got to see a fight, which would have been nice. But other then that, it was pretty uneventful. MU sucked big time too.
Sunday, we went to the pumpkin fest in Hartsburg with Dusty, Kelci, and Kamryn. It was super lame, packed with people, and didn't satisfy. And, it was hot too.
So, not a lot going on, I have some good pics I need to upload, especially from the pumpkin fest.
Sunday, we went to the pumpkin fest in Hartsburg with Dusty, Kelci, and Kamryn. It was super lame, packed with people, and didn't satisfy. And, it was hot too.
So, not a lot going on, I have some good pics I need to upload, especially from the pumpkin fest.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Like a fire hose...
Friday night, Alicia and I went to the Roots n' Blues festival with Dusty and Kelci. We had a sitter for the boys for the first time in forever. It was pretty interesting watching the trash come out of the woodwork for the free entertainment. I don't know how many rat tails I saw, I tried to snap some pics of them in stealth mode but didn't have and luck. We had dinner at Addisons and I had a very tasty pizza and a couple of 1554 black ales.
I got up bright and early Saturday to meet up with Steve and Jasen at Rockbridge. I decided to ride out there, and took the singlespeed, which I had just done some work on the day before (new cables, housing, chain). This is where things started to go sour. On the way out there, I noticed something wrong with my position on the bike. It wasn't just a difference in bikes, I can usually jump on this bike and it feels like home to me. Somehow, my saddle was waaaaayyyy back on the rails, and a little low. Not sure how that happened, it hadn't been adjusted forever. So, when I got there, I started to work on it and got it dialed back in, I thought. It was cold, and I neglected to wear knee warmers. Well, we took off, and my knees started to ache from pushing a big gear, the cold, and my position was still not right. I also took a bad line and had a stick go into my back wheel right off the bat. No worries, right? Well, I was really sucking wind, and pushing harder then I thought I should have to up the hills to stay on top of my gear. Well, we rode for a couple of hours, and I had all intentions of riding home until Jasen offered me a ride home. I took him up on it. When we got to my house, I took my bike off the rack, set it down, and noticed that the rear wheel was pretty much locked up. My brake was rubbing so bad, it would skid across the pavement if you pushed it. Come to find out, I had a broken spoke, and it knocked my wheel way out of true. Nice. Well, I went inside and cleaned up a bit, and went to Sams Club with A and the boys. While we were there, I started to notice that I was feeling not so good. I thought maybe I was a little calorie deprived, so I bought a big Coke. Drank it on the way home. Ate lunch which consisted of 2 sandwiches with turkey, smoked cheese, and avacado. Really started to not feel good. Decided to lay down with Dillon for his nap, only planned on laying there for 30 minutes so Alicia could go run, but ended up napping with him for a couple of hours. We got up, and I really felt like shit. Apologized to Alicia for her not getting to run, then went back in and laid down. That lasted for all of about 30 seconds, I ran to the bathroom and puked my guts out. I have never thrown up like that, my mouth was wide open and the stream of vomit that came jetting out was impressive. It was roughly the diameter of a softball, hi powered, and full of little chunks of food, and 32 ounces of Coke. I forgot what it is like to puke, how you should not fight it and just let it flow, so I mistakenly braced my legs on the wall behind me with my head hanging in the toilet, and tried to hold back. Oops, now it was coming out my nose too. I heard Dillon in the other room asking mommy if he could come in and see what was going on. Thankfully she said no. Well, I finally finished up, and blew out my nose which was full of little chunks of gouda and avacado. Took off my shirt, which had puke on it, cleaned up my mess and the spatter, and laid back down. I had worked up quite a sweat also, and I had to towel down my body too. Shivered for a bit, then got hot. I skipped dinner, stayed in bed for the rest of the day. I felt a little better Sunday morning, and was able to choke down a bagel, and some coffee. I felt better bit by bit throughout the day, but still not enough to accept the beer my neighbor offered me when we stopped at his house during our post dinner walk. Monday, I felt a lot better. And, I was hungry!
On another note, if you don't know already, Dillon is potty trained, for the most part. I am not a big fan of him pooping in his little potty, I try to get him to use the ring on the toilet so the poop will have some water to cover it and the smell. And, the clean up is obviously easier, you just have to flush it down as opposed to cleaning out the little tray that it lands in on his potty. Anyway, he calls his poops "roly pollies". How funny is that???
I got up bright and early Saturday to meet up with Steve and Jasen at Rockbridge. I decided to ride out there, and took the singlespeed, which I had just done some work on the day before (new cables, housing, chain). This is where things started to go sour. On the way out there, I noticed something wrong with my position on the bike. It wasn't just a difference in bikes, I can usually jump on this bike and it feels like home to me. Somehow, my saddle was waaaaayyyy back on the rails, and a little low. Not sure how that happened, it hadn't been adjusted forever. So, when I got there, I started to work on it and got it dialed back in, I thought. It was cold, and I neglected to wear knee warmers. Well, we took off, and my knees started to ache from pushing a big gear, the cold, and my position was still not right. I also took a bad line and had a stick go into my back wheel right off the bat. No worries, right? Well, I was really sucking wind, and pushing harder then I thought I should have to up the hills to stay on top of my gear. Well, we rode for a couple of hours, and I had all intentions of riding home until Jasen offered me a ride home. I took him up on it. When we got to my house, I took my bike off the rack, set it down, and noticed that the rear wheel was pretty much locked up. My brake was rubbing so bad, it would skid across the pavement if you pushed it. Come to find out, I had a broken spoke, and it knocked my wheel way out of true. Nice. Well, I went inside and cleaned up a bit, and went to Sams Club with A and the boys. While we were there, I started to notice that I was feeling not so good. I thought maybe I was a little calorie deprived, so I bought a big Coke. Drank it on the way home. Ate lunch which consisted of 2 sandwiches with turkey, smoked cheese, and avacado. Really started to not feel good. Decided to lay down with Dillon for his nap, only planned on laying there for 30 minutes so Alicia could go run, but ended up napping with him for a couple of hours. We got up, and I really felt like shit. Apologized to Alicia for her not getting to run, then went back in and laid down. That lasted for all of about 30 seconds, I ran to the bathroom and puked my guts out. I have never thrown up like that, my mouth was wide open and the stream of vomit that came jetting out was impressive. It was roughly the diameter of a softball, hi powered, and full of little chunks of food, and 32 ounces of Coke. I forgot what it is like to puke, how you should not fight it and just let it flow, so I mistakenly braced my legs on the wall behind me with my head hanging in the toilet, and tried to hold back. Oops, now it was coming out my nose too. I heard Dillon in the other room asking mommy if he could come in and see what was going on. Thankfully she said no. Well, I finally finished up, and blew out my nose which was full of little chunks of gouda and avacado. Took off my shirt, which had puke on it, cleaned up my mess and the spatter, and laid back down. I had worked up quite a sweat also, and I had to towel down my body too. Shivered for a bit, then got hot. I skipped dinner, stayed in bed for the rest of the day. I felt a little better Sunday morning, and was able to choke down a bagel, and some coffee. I felt better bit by bit throughout the day, but still not enough to accept the beer my neighbor offered me when we stopped at his house during our post dinner walk. Monday, I felt a lot better. And, I was hungry!
On another note, if you don't know already, Dillon is potty trained, for the most part. I am not a big fan of him pooping in his little potty, I try to get him to use the ring on the toilet so the poop will have some water to cover it and the smell. And, the clean up is obviously easier, you just have to flush it down as opposed to cleaning out the little tray that it lands in on his potty. Anyway, he calls his poops "roly pollies". How funny is that???
Monday, October 06, 2008
Raise up off of
Friday, October 03, 20082 things I saw the above character on my commute to Jeff City via the Katy Trail. That would be a copperhead, I think, and he was not too stoked to have his pic taken. I was actually pretty close to the guy, about 3 feet. There were some people coming on the trail while I was doing this, and I was pointing it out. Of course they were riding 4 abreast and had waist pack hydration packs on. And bar end mirrors. I didn't want them to run over this guy and kill him. I don't care if they get bit, though. Anyway, they looked at me like I was crazy or I had shit on my face or something. Its a good thing Butthead wasn't there...  This is what happens to the awning on a bank drive up when your wife goes under it with your Litespeed cross bike on the roof. I am glad my bike is titanium. It did wreck my saddle pretty bad, but it could have been worse. So now I am riding a bike without a saddle.
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